Mother's Day 2026 Essay 2

Title： After Searching So Long for the Right Answer

Author： Akari

Ever since I was a child, I thought it was normal to hold things in.

I did what I was told and tried to be a “good girl” all the time. Maybe I did not even know that I had feelings of my own.

Even after I became an adult and then a mother, that way of living did not change. Before I knew it, I was not only forcing myself to be patient, but also making the people around me do the same.

Little by little, and very surely, things began to fall out of place.

Even after I decided to raise my son as a single mother, I was still trying to be a proper mother. I was even determined to play the role of his father, too.

I had chosen my work because I wanted to support people’s lives. But my beliefs were not understood, and every day, I found myself moving further away from what I had wanted to do. I kept doing things that were not true to my original hopes, just to avoid causing trouble. Before I knew it, I had worn myself down completely, both physically and emotionally.

The air around me at that time felt heavy. I was even trying to breathe without being noticed.

One day, during that period, I happened to stop by a bookstore. There, my eyes were drawn to a box. Or maybe it would be more accurate to say that, for a moment, my eyes met the brightly colored dragon drawn on the box.

As if I were being guided, I picked it up.

When I got home and gently opened the box, I was surprised to find that it was a set of fortune-telling cards.

Half-doubtful, I drew one card.

It was a card called Zuiryu, with striking wide-open eyes. On it were the words:“An impossible miracle will happen.”

It felt as if the card was saying to me,

“Things will get better from here. You don’t need to feel guilty.”

A small light softly turned on in the dark room.

Cards are so interesting. Words have so much power.

Each time I drew a card, I felt as if I was finally taking care of my own heart, something I had neglected for so long. I became completely absorbed in it.

After I regained a little energy, I thought, “I can’t keep doing this. I have to work hard!” So I stepped away from the cards that had brought me joy, and once again began wandering around in search of the “right answer.”

By then, I no longer knew what I had to do, or even what I should choose.

Around that time, I went to the city hall for a work consultation. At the counter, I saw a small card that said, “Self-Care Program for Single Mothers.”

In the past, I might have ignored it. But maybe the words “card” and “self-care” felt like a strange coincidence.

“May I take this?” I asked.

Before I knew it, I had picked it up.

I decided to join the program, with a small hope that it might become some kind of turning point.

The program gave me a slow and quiet time to face myself. It helped me look at feelings I had been trying not to see. I listened to other single mothers share their stories, nodded many times in my heart, and found names for feelings I had never been able to put into words. My world began to open up.

Then, suddenly, I felt a connection to that feeling I had when I was drawing cards.

“Maybe I should become a fortune teller.”

I was surprised that such a thought had come up inside me.

Then the “me” inside myself began to speak.

“But isn’t that a suspicious kind of job? Are you really going to give up stable work?”

“What happened to your beliefs? Maybe fortune-telling can also be a way to support someone’s life.”

“No, no. You should keep working and put up with it for the sake of your life. Sometimes you can even enjoy small luxuries, right?”

Again and again, I remembered the first trip I took alone with my son. I remembered how happily he played in the open-air bath in our room.

Even so, I made my decision.

“I’ll try it for two years. If it doesn’t work, I can go back.”

I told this to my nervous self and took one step forward.

I threw myself into studying fortune-telling, and little by little, it began to bring in income. When the person in front of me smiled, I felt that I had been able to help them. That made me very happy.

But at the same time, somewhere inside, I was afraid.

“Is it really okay for me to do something I love this much? Am I making a mistake?”

One day, while I was carrying that doubt, my son came up to me with a happy look on his face and said,

“Mom, thank you for doing what you love. You look so happy!”

For a moment, I could not understand what he meant, and I asked him again.

“You’re happy when I do what I love?”

My son nodded as if it were the most natural thing in the world, and hugged me tightly.

My voice almost trembled, and I could not say anything back. His back, which had grown a little taller, gently hid my tears.

“You are me, and I am you.”

Those words suddenly came to me.

And the words “because I’m a mother” quietly began to loosen their hold on me.

The “right answer” I had been searching for all this time had been so close to me.

My son’s words reached my heart more directly than any card ever could.

Maybe life is like drawing a card. You never know what will come up.

There is no such thing as the “correct” card.

You are allowed to decide for yourself how to receive the card you have drawn.

And you are allowed to draw again.

What kind of card have you drawn? If you are smiling now, then it is okay.

You are not wrong.

Call for Donations
Thank you for reading this essay to the end. This essay was written by a single mother Akari for Mother's Day2026. The non-profit organization The nonprofit organization Single Mothers Sisterhood supports the mental and physical health and empowerment of single mothers. Your generous donations will be carefully used to fund the operation of 'Self-Care Workshops for Single Mothers'. Donations are accepted on our donation page here.